You Know We Have Kids in the U.S., too, Right?

Yes, we are aware that there are children in need of families here in the United States.  There are orphans in every country in the world.  They all need families, and they are all loved by God and important.  My heart breaks for each one of them.  My voice will cry out for each one of them until they are all cared for and loved or until I have no breath left.

So why am I adopting from Eastern Europe?  Because my heart is there.  I can't totally explain it; it's like it's a part of my DNA or something.  Once my heart was gripped, then I had no choice to remain unchanged and inactive.  But here are some things I consider...

Orphans who grow up in the U.S. will still come out ahead of orphans in a socialist or third world country.  You don't hear about teenagers (yes, teenagers) here in the U.S. who weigh less than their age.  And yet I've read about, seen pictures of, and talked to the families of at least half a dozen children who weigh less than their age.  Just today I received a message asking me to pray for a fourteen year old who weighs only 9 pounds.  That's less than half the weight of our Toddler.  Nor are the orphans in the U.S. marked even as adults with a stigma that prevents them from getting certain jobs.  The teenage girls here are not more likely to enter prostitution than get a high school diploma.  This is not one of the leading countries in the exporting of humans.  Nor is this a country notorious for its lack of love and care for its orphans.

I guess I want to start with the least of these.

Take a peek at this video to see the TRUTH.

I Wish I Could Help, but...

So many folks tell me I must be something special, but I promise it's not that.  Some tell me they could never do what I do.  That may be true -- after all, none of us were created to do what someone else does -- we were called to be individually unique.  I've even heard some people tell me it's a shame and "someone" ought to do something (this post ... not for those folks!).  And other people I've talked to feel despair because they don't think they can help, and yet they are moved by the need.

Those people (YOU?) are the ones this blog post is for today.  You CAN make a difference.  And if you are truly moved, you WILL make a difference.  It's that simple, that basic, that necessary.  Because a changed heart makes a change in the world.

I don't know about you, but looking at these faces has changed me.  Perhaps it's because I played with them, hugged them, talked with them, loved them, prayed for them.  Perhaps it's because I've lost sleep thinking about their bloody, sore feet or lack of basic necessities.  Perhaps it's because each one of these children just wants to be loved.  It's that simple, that basic, that essential.

All they want is someone to care about them.  The news that makes me happy to share is that two of the children above have been adopted this past month, one is now our son, one has his parents coming for him soon, and the others do have people who are making a difference in their lives even if from afar.  The news that makes me weep at night is that there are hundreds of thousands more without that reality.

So what can YOU do?
A lot ... a little ... just please do something!

The simplest way to help us is to click on the donate button the left hand side of this blog post.  It goes straight into our Family Sponsorship Program grant and will help us with our in country expenses as we prepare to return to Eastern Europe to adopt our sweet girl, waiting in a children's institution.  She has Down syndrome and really needs to get out of there and start getting the help she needs to ensure a future.  We also have a goal for the month of December to collect at least $10 in donations from every state in the U.S.  If you want to help with that, check it out HERE.

The next easiest way to help, if you don't want to just click a button or give money, is to sow your time.  Your time can help us if you want to host a jewelry party (this would make a great Ladies Night or even a Princess Birthday Party) with Perfect Joy Designs.  100% of money made at these events goes to adopting families and/or orphan care worldwide.  We're also always looking for folks to host a Fun Night In (leave a comment if you want more info on holding a party that saves lives!).

If you want to help in a broader sense, we support and would love to have you partner with us in supporting Grace to Ukraine.  Suzette Davie and her organization run a beautiful ministry reaching out to orphans in Ukraine on many different levels.  They have supplied diapers and bed pads to special needs orphanages, helped with camps in Eastern Ukraine, and brings children here in the summer for hosting programs.  She has also offered us sweet, encouraging support on our adoption journeys.  Check out the facebook page for current projects and ways to be involved.

And there are more ways to get involved, too.  You can bring an adopting family dinner.  You can help them around the house.  You can offer a word of support.

AND YOU CAN PRAY.  For prayer does not equip for the greater work; it is the greater work! (O. Chambers)

The UNITED States of America

I'm hoping for folks to UNITE with us this month.  I know this month is Christmas and that means that money is tighter than usual.  I'm asking for something really fun, though.  Are you ready?

I want to see people all across the U.S.A. unite with us to help us Bring Our Angel Home.  My goal is to have at least $10 in donations from EVERY SINGLE STATE.  Donations of $35 or more from a single person will result in a lovely handmade Christmas ornament from our family to yours -- mailed right to your door!  Will you do it?  Will you help us?  YAY!!!

Just paypal your gift to lisaytucker @ gmail.com as a personal donation and leave a note as to what state it is.  If you send $35 or more and would like us to mail you an ornament, include your address in that note!

1. Alabama $10
2. Alaska
3. Arizona
4. Arkansas
5. California
6. Colorado
7. Connecticut
8. Delaware
9. Florida
10. Georgia
11. Hawaii
12. Idaho
13. Illinois
14. Indiana
15. Iowa
16. Kansas
17. Kentucky
18. Louisiana
19. Maine
20. Maryland
21. Massachusettes
22. Michigan
23. Minnesota
24. Mississippi
25. Missouri
26. Montana
27. Nebraska
28. Nevada
29. New Hampshire
30. New Jersey
31. New Mexico
32. New York $10
33. North Carolina
34. North Dakota
35. Ohio
36. Oklahoma
37. Oregon
38. Pennsylvania
39. Rhode Island
40. South Carolina
41. South Dakota
42. Tennessee
43. Texas
44. Utah
45. Vermont
46. Virginia
47. Washington
48. West Virginia
49. Wisconsin
50. Wyoming

Learning About Trust

One thing this journey constantly enforces in my heart is trust.  Trust in my family, trust in our facilitators, trust in our God.  This is not an easy journey.  Often in the darkest hours of the night I lay tossing, sleepless, worrying.  When I wake up, I see those things I was worrying over as opportunities to trust.  This week is a really challenging one for me.  I'm struggling more than I usually do to trust and to hope.  But it is making me cling even more to God, so good is coming from it.  I cannot see how these mountains will be moved, but I trust that they will.  Because as much I love my children, God's passion far exceeds my own.  And He can do greater things that I can dream.

Will You Partner With Us?

We shared with you the list of expenses we will incur as we adopt this time around.  What I haven't shared is our progress and our continued need.  I wanted to give all of you who are keeping up with us and praying for us an update!

 
• Homestudy Fee: $2,000 PAID 11/15
• Required Education/Class: $115  PAID 11/15
• Medical Exams/Blood work: $500 
• Apostilles and Document Fees: $350 Funded 11/27
• Application free, donation, promise trust for Reece's Rainbow: $1,275  PAID 11/5
• Shipping for Paperwork to Kyiv: $115 x 2 = $230 
• US Immigration (USCIS): $890
• Facilitator Expenses: $9,000 (facilitator fees, document expenses, and travel/lodging for our facilitator)
• Orphanage Donation: $500 (up to $1,000 depending)
• Medical Exam and Visa: $500 {Almost there ... need $240 more!}
• Passport Fees: $400 (or more ... the last one cost us $1200!)
• Birth Certificate Expenses: $250
• Lodging/Transport/Food in Kyiv (both times): $500
• Lodging in Region: $1,400 (we will try to save money here, but this is what we spent last time and prices are comparable)
• Food in Region: $600 (we loved local markets last time!)
• Transportation in Region: $20/day for 5 weeks = $700 (we were given this number from other families adopting from the same orphanage; it is the cost to go from the city to the orphanage and back, twice daily, for visits with our angel).
• Trains to region and back to Kyiv: $800
• Airfare: $10,000
  
  TOTAL: $30,010
• Paid:$3,390
• Funded:$350
• Next Goal:$260 out of $500 raised
• Total Needed:$26,270

God, Forgive Us All

Here's something to ponder.
To weep over.
To fast for.

TO ACT ON.

State/# of Orphans/# of Churches

Alabama/ 1,296/ 10,760
Alaska/ 714/ 1,050
Arizona/ 2,822/ 3,771

Arkansas/ 1,414/ 6,343
California/ 12,881/ 22,798
Colorado/ 1,098/ 3,813
Connecticut/ 1,341/ 2,909
Delaware/ 244/ 1,009
District of Columbia/ 357/ 825
Florida/ 4,994/ 16,805
Georgia/ 1,567/ 14,380
Hawaii/ 277/ 1,163
Idaho/ 334/ 1,776
Illinois/ 3,272/ 13,097
Indiana/ 2,886/ 9,204
Iowa/ 1,088/ 4,766
Kansas/ 1,817/ 4,615
Kentucky/ 1,918/ 6,859
Louisiana/ 1,162/ 7,983
Maine/ 511/ 1,539
Maryland/ 719/ 5,816
Massachusetts/ 2,672/ 4,039
Michigan/ 4,237/ 11,169
Minnesota/ 955/ 5,628
Mississippi/ 880/ 7,718
Missouri/ 1,946/ 8,973
Montana/ 460/ 1,518
Nebraska/ 831/ 2,595
Nevada/ 1,968/ 1,248
New Hampshire/ 167/ 1,033
New Jersey/ 2,294/ 6,713
New Mexico/ 786/ 1,796
New York/ 6,418/ 14,767
North Carolina/ 2,234/ 17,625
North Dakota/ 230/ 1,252
Ohio/ 2,789/ 14,657
Oklahoma/ 2,956/ 6,737
Oregon/ 1,663/ 3,646
Pennsylvania/ 2,045/ 15,539
Rhode Island/ 267/ 703
South Carolina/ 1,415/ 9,479
South Dakota/ 376/ 1,368
Tennessee/ 2,027/ 11,179
Texas/ 13,481/ 27,505
Utah/ 567/ 2,582
Vermont/ 196/ 692
Virginia/ 1,372/ 10,952
Washington/ 2,783/ 5,393
West Virginia/ 1,473/ 3,432
Wisconsin/ 1,163/ 6,045
Wyoming/ 127/ 803
Puerto Rico/ 746

Total/ 104,236/ 348,067

# of Orphans in Ukraine: approximately 103,000 - 105,000

Orphans in the USA+Orphans in Ukraine = (approx.) 207,236

348,067 - 207,236 = 140,831 more 'churches' than 'orphans' from two countries. Not 140,831 more "Christians" than orphans.

A huge problem could be easily solved.

http://www.gracetoukraine.net/index.html

http://karensprings.blogspot.com/2010/09/some-stats-on-ukrainian-orphans.html

http://www.adoptuskids.org/

http://www.adoptfromafrica.org/

http://www.gwca.org/

http://www.cwa.org/aid-adoption.htm - Financial aid.

http://www.christianadoptiononline.com/ - Financial aid.

http://www.bethany.org/

http://showhope.org/

http://adoption.about.com/od/international/bb/adoptionfare.htm - Airfare financial assitance for adoptive parents.

http://www.fellowship.com/flights/adoption.html - Airfare financial assistance for adoptive parents.

Just a few links for adoption assistance, information, and people helping orphans. :)

Adoption is a Rainy Journey

I think God is really wanting me to learn that He calls me to walk by faith and not by sight. I'm listening and trying to learn. Last night when I cried before Him, I pictured a dreary day of rain. Bare branches, naked earth, gray skies. And then God reminded me that during this dormant time, as the heavens weep over the earth, new life is rooting beneath the surface so that it is strong enough to sustain the victorious blossoms that will burst forth at their appointed time. Even though I cannot see them. Yet.

Adoption is like that.  It's full of rain.  There are puddles, there is thunder, there are slippery spots.  And it all brings new life and growth and beauty.  It's necessary.

Our last adoption journey felt like a roller coaster.  There were days I wondered how we'd make it to the final stretch, although I never doubted that we would.  This time around is not quite the same because I learned the precious truth last time that GOD IS WORTHY.

I always knew that.  But I don't know that I had ever lived it in quite the way I had to when we adopted our Eldest.  And now we are adopting our Angel.  God alone knows what our angel looks like, what she enjoys, what she hopes for.  God alone knows how our family will look when He completes it.  All we know is that He is growing us again, and like all growing things we need the watering process, too.  So it's raining in our lives right now, but instead of hiding and waiting for it to pass I'm going to DANCE in it!

Wish You Could Help? YOU CAN!

No man is an island.  And nothing we've experienced in life has proven that more true than the journey of adoption.  Our last time around, we provided the majority of the money ourselves, had a few really gracious gifts, and did a handful of fundraisers.  This time, because it's so close to the prior time, we don't have that jump start that propelled us forward like last time.  It's a little daunting and there are times I get overwhelmed.  So I'm asking for help.

We're trying not to burden people with our need to fundraise, but the truth is that we cannot bring our girl home without help.  We've been offered TWO matching grants, each one $1,000!!!  That means, if we meet them both, we'll have raised $4,000 this month.  The cool part is that for every $5 you give, we get $10.  I like that math :)

The simplest way to give is to paypal your donation to lisaytucker@gmail.com and select "personal" and then "gift".  But if you want to give more or do more, we've got some great events coming up, an auction I'm trying to get together, and a PARTY!  I just need some hosts/hostesses.

Here's the way to play the Party Game with us.  Invite your friends for a night out ... kind of.  This time, instead of dropping $10 or more on appetizers, dinner, a movie, or whatever they will drop it in a jar at your house on behalf of Ana Sophia.  You will be their host/hostess for the evening and provide snacks and entertainment (movie, games, chatting, music, a campfire, whatever!).  If we can find ten people who will have ten people over, we can earn $1,000 from this alone! WOW.

Some possible themes are:

• Crafts and Snacks
• Popcorn and a Movie
• Dinner Date (invite five of your favorite couples over!)
• Games and Treats
• 80s Night
• Disco Fever
• Christmas Cookie Exchange 

"I Could Never Do What You Do..."

"I could never do what you do."

I hear that  A LOT. 
It often surprises me, if we are being honest. 

I'm not Super Woman.  I'm not June Cleaver.  I'm not Joan of Arc.  I am a God-lover.  I am a wife.  I am a mom.  I love my family.  I teach, I play, I clean, I cook, I take pictures.  I'm not extraordinary.  I don't do amazing things.  I'm just me.

But the more I think on it, there more I think it's true.  You never could do what I do.  Because you're not me and you weren't created to.  And I could never do what you do.  That was never God's plan for my life.  We all need to blossom in our own unique way, the way our Creator intended us to.

So don't look at me and think I'm awesome.  Look at me understand that I'm just doing my best to be who God called me to be.  We don't have to share the same dreams to be friends.  We don't have to enjoy the same hobbies to hang out.  We don't have to like the same foods, wear the same styles, or listen to the same music.  We just have to love each other and support one another.

The comments came during our last adoption, too.  I know that we are ALL called to be a part of solving the world's orphan crisis. After all, James tells us that true and undefiled is taking care of orphans and widows.  But I don't expect all my friends to run out and adopt.  There are so many ways to help!  If a mere 10% of the world's Christian families adopted, there would be no more children without families. 

It just so happens that we have a passion to bring children into families.  Maybe you have a passion to pray.  Or fundraise.  Or go and visit.  Who knows?  We all have our roles.  Don't compare yourself to me or any other person; look to God and find YOUR PURPOSE and YOUR ROLE and revel in the fact that YOU were chosen to live YOUR LIFE.  But do something!

This is copied from a FB page that popped up in my newsfeed (thanks to Kate for sharing it, and Amy E. for penning it!) and I cannot say it better:

Today, Orphan Sunday, I am thankful that my V is an orphan no more. After church today she bit me, hit me, pulled my hair, screamed and fought as I wrestled her to the van. I chuckled inside as I thought about saying to each person that we passed, "Don't you want to adopt a child too?" :)

The scene did not exactly exude warm fuzzies about adoption.

Rather, the scene shouted ORPHAN CRISIS! May I suggest, the orphan crisis is not just the millions and millions and MILLIONS of orphaned children around the world. It's not just the number. The orphan crisis lives inside each of them.
They carry their trauma, neglect, abuse, etc. with them. Their trauma will not be healed overnight (or 16 months). It runs deep, friends. Whenever V begins to feel love from J or I, she does whatever she has to do to fight it. She doesn't understand unconditional love. She doesn't know how to respond to it. She has asked us why we don't leave her when she screams and hurts us. This is the orphan crisis. It's in my home and the homes of some of my dearest, most courageous friends. Would any of you tell my precious V that she doesn't deserve a family because of her negative behaviors? I didn't think so. So, what is stopping you?

PLEASE consider what you can do for an orphan. Foster. Adopt. Pray. Donate. Advocate. Spread awareness and be willing to step out of your comfort zone. We solve the orphan problem one child at a time.

Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could only do a little.

What can YOU do? What WILL you do?They carry their trauma, neglect, abuse, etc. with them. Their trauma will not be healed overnight (or 16 months). It runs deep, friends. Whenever V begins to feel love from J or I, she does whatever she has to do to fight it. She doesn't understand unconditional love. She doesn't know how to respond to it. She has asked us why we don't leave her when she screams and hurts us. This is the orphan crisis. It's in my home and the homes of some of my dearest, most courageous friends. Would any of you tell my precious V that she doesn't deserve a family because of her negative behaviors? I didn't think so. So, what is stopping you?
PLEASE consider what you can do for an orphan. Foster. Adopt. Pray. Donate. Advocate. Spread awareness and be willing to step out of your comfort zone. We solve the orphan problem one child at a time.
Nobody made a greater mistake than he who did nothing because he could only do a little.
What can YOU do? What WILL you do?

Orphan Sunday

Today is Orphan Sunday.  An entire day dedicated to making people aware of the plight of orphans in the world.  I could go on and on and on here.  But I won't.  I will tell you that my life has been forever changed after meeting one.

This sweet girl turned my whole world upside down.  Our entire family fell in love with her, from Papa Bear down to the Warrior.  We never did get to bring her home to join our family, but God did use her to open our hearts wider so that we could pursue our Eldest.  And now our Angel.  David Platt hit the nail on the head when he said:

“We learned that orphans are easier to ignore before you know their names. They are easier to ignore before you see their faces. It is easier to pretend they’re not real before you hold them in your arms. But once you do, everything changes.”
 

And then we traveled to Eastern Europe and met these amazing children.  You can read all about the awesome adventure God took us on HERE -- the adventure we weren't even there for but got to partake in anyhow.  It was amazing.  It changed our lives.  They changed our lives.

 

 

And now we are pursuing one more.  Sweet Angel.  We have a matching grant that has been offered to us, so every dollar we raise in the month of November (up to $1,000) will be DOUBLED.  Please help us out ... even $1 will make a difference.  Don't think it doesn't matter, because it does. And because we just returned home not that long ago, we're starting all over.  We understand the mountain before us, and we thank God all we need is faith the size of a mustard seed to move it on out of our way!  And we need your prayers.  Because, more than anything, they change lives.  Oswald Chambers issued the challenge to pray with a reckless faith; that is is what I am doing.

 

Aren't You Rushing Into This?

"Aren't you rushing into this?"

I have been asked that handful of times over the last few days.  And the answer is "Yes, I'm rushing!  But only after two and a half years of prayers and wrestling and waiting."

You see, Papa Bear and I are rushing to get to Eastern Europe to make sweet Angel ours officially because every day she spends there is one more day she goes unloved by a mother and a father, one more day she lacks the bountiful nutrition and medical attention we long for her to have, one more day she sits and waits without a family.  And one day longer than necessary is too darn long!

But this journey started more than two years ago.  It started with a dream one of us had.  I may share that another time, but it's still pretty special to me and for now it's a little personal.  I think Mary had it right; Luke tells us she took all these things and pondered them in her heart.  I'm a ponderer.  I love to meditate on what God has shared.  And while a lot pours out, sometimes the most precious gems belong kept in the treasure chest.

After we had our little Warrior, we adopted the Eldest.  But still we prayed for a precious baby girl, because the longing was intense.  God gives us the desires of our heart, and that desire just kept growing and growing and growing.

Until we saw her face.  And then the desire became a passionate longing to hold our daughter.  So that is what we are doing ... working to bring our girl home!

We're Growing...Again!

Yup, that's us.  Constantly growing.  Never static.  Always fun. 

Our family started back in 2001 when Papa Bear and Mama Bear got hitched.  Two crazy kids, best friends from college, filled with dreams for the future.  I gotta tell you, it doesn't look much like we dreamed it would.  No dream was big enough to encompass this awesome reality!

First to join us was the Princess.  She was our first surprise, and continues to surprise us.  She arrived squalling and has been pretty vocal about her opinions and beliefs ever since; it's awesome!  Princess has been my sweet darling since I first held her; I'm so thankful for a daugther I delight in.  She is chatty, sweet, girly, and has a heart bigger than I would have ever thought to pray for.  She loves to dance, to snuggle, to play, and to read.  She adores biographies and gets buried in mysteries.  She nurtures her little brother, wrestles with her biggest brother, and plays with her big brother.  And she prays constantly for a sister in the midst of it all.

Next to come along was our Buddy.  He, too, was a precious surprise from God.  He came out quiet and alert ... and never really went back to sleep after that.  From the beginning he was strong, steady, and observant.  Not prone to much emotion, but the emotions he does have run deep.  Buddy is everyone's friend and his heart radiates compassion.  He gives the best hugs!  He loves to follow the biggest brother around and do everything with him.  He plays chess, monopoly, and Uno like a pro.  His brain works in amazing ways and I marvel when I listen to him work out math or logic challenges as though they were simple little riddles.  He also has a great ear for languages and is working on becoming bilingual.

The third to arrive was the Warrior.  He came early and quick, setting his own course.  He hasn't changed at all!  He is the sweetest toddler you can imagine, and the most tenacious Warrior as well.  He knows his own mind and loves with his whole heart.  He doesn't have much to say, but he expresses himself with every nuance and action so clearly you can have an entire conversation with him.  What words he does know well are split between two languages.  It's kind of funny!  He adores the biggest brother, delights in the big brother, and is devoted to his Sissy.  He can make a gray day burst full of sun with his giggles and grins.

The biggest brother is our most recent family member.  He is the Eldest and has risen to the occasion with pride and joy.  I often forget that he has not always been here because he fits so perfectly.  When God first called us to adopt, we had no idea he would be our son.  The first time we saw his photo, we fell in love with his smile.  When we met him, we fell in love with his charm.  Now that he is ours, we love every little thing about him.  He nurtures the Warrior, encourages and teaches Buddy, and dotes on {and teases!} the Princess.  He is affectionate and tender, but strong and determined.  His is capable; an able young man who assesses a challenge and quickly rises to it.  He loves to tinker and has an artistic streak a mile wide.

And now there's Angel.  Angel is a sweet little girl.  I can't tell you much other than that she has soulful eyes, a determined spirit, and is our fifth child.  Even though I've never held her or heard her voice, she is mine.  Papa Bear and I took one look at her and we knew she was the answer to the prayers we had been praying for a baby girl.  She has been growing in my heart for months.  And it seems she has needed us longer than that.  My heart breaks when I think about her sitting in an institution, not knowing the love of a family.  This blog is our journey to bring our Angel home.